You’ve Got Me Messed Up!

You’ve got me messed up.

You’ve got me drinking

Because I’m pissed off over wasted time.

Had me making unnecessary changes

When all along

It wasn’t me, it was you

Who was all wrong.

You’ve got me messed up.

You’ve got me changing my look

Taking special care

Trying to make my ways pleasing

When all the while you were deceiving?

You were trying to turn me into someone

You weren’t willing or even able to be for me?

Oh, boy, you’ve got me messed up.

It’s was never about me, it was always about you.

Though you could name every one of my flaws,

You would never admit that you were the cause… well, of most of them.

You were blind to your own demons.

You would pick and choose our sins.

Your lips would never touch my wine glass,

But you had no problem drinking from my cup?

Well if you thought you’d get another chance,

Bruh, you’ve got me messed up!

March 19, 2018March 17, 2018

Indifferent

You were my first thought every morning,

Memories of you flooded my mind before

The light of the new day hit my eyes,

But now I’m just…

Indifferent

You were my last thought every evening,

Hopes and dreams of what never will be

You were my first thought every morning,

Memories of you flooded my mind before

The light of the new day hit my eyes,

But now I’m just…

Indifferent

You were my last thought every evening,

Hopes and dreams of what never will be

Gave me a secret smile and sent me off to a place where we were perfect,

But now I’m just …

Indifferent.

There were times when I just wanted to be beside you,

I wanted to wear your clothes,

I wanted to sleep on your pillow, or even just breathe your air,

But now I’m just…

Indifferent.

There was a time when every decision I made

Was in consideration of

What you would think,

How you would feel,

Whether or not you would approve,

But now I’m just…

Indifferent.

I’d carefully select each outfit,

I’d curl my hair just so,

I’d apply my makeup; not too much, just enough to give me that glow.

I desperately tried to present the picture of me

That you desperately wanted to see,

But now, I’m just

Indifferent.

I’ve learned that I was letting your opinion of me

Be more than my opinion of myself

And neither of us valued me as much as He.

So, now I try to please Him.

Put a smile upon His face

I walk with a whole new confidence

Because I’m walking in His grace.

I’ve never experienced such a peacefulness

I’ve never known so much joy

I can smile genuinely and deeply,

Because now, I’m just

Different!